I grew up in a fundamentalist, Christian church.  And I mean that literally.  The pastor, the deacons, and the choir director were all relatives of mine through either blood or marriage.

So, it wasn't unheard of for family gatherings to become impromptu "worship sessions".

Additionally, we attended bible study every Wednesday, choir practice every Saturday (even though I wasn't in the choir), and two church services on Sunday.  

Each week my siblings and I were expected to memorize a bible verse, and recite it for the congregation.  If we were successful, then we usually got ice cream as a reward.  As a result, I know the bible extremely well, and sometimes I think about bible stories in a Buddhist context.  Recently, the story of Abraham has been on my mind.

Abraham was a nomadic shepherd who lived in the land of Canaan.  He was a faithful servant of God, and he'd been blessed with a great deal of material wealth.  But after many years of trying he was unable to have a child with his wife, Sarah.

This was a problem for two reasons.  First, having a male heir was absolutely essential back then because women weren't allowed to inherit property.  So, there'd be no one to care for Sarah if Abraham died before her, and no one to carry on his legacy.

Second, God had promised Abraham several times that not only would he have an heir, but he would be the father of a great nation.  And his children would be as numerous as the sands of the desert.

With this in mind, Abraham remained faithful well into his old age, and eventually he and Sarah were blessed with a son who he named Issac.  But God had one final test for the old man.  When Issac was a young boy, God instructed Abraham to take his son into the mountains and offer him up as a sacrifice.

God told Abraham to kill his own child.

Ever the obedient servant, Abraham took Issac into the mountains, tied him up, and placed him on the altar.  He raised his knife to deliver the killing blow, but at the last moment God stopped him, commended him for his faith, and provided him with a ram to sacrifice instead.

I struggled with this story growing up.  It seemed cruel.  Now that I'm grown it still seems cruel, but I think I understand it.  The lord promised Abraham that he'd be the father of a great nation.  But you don't get something that big for free.  It requires sacrifice.

When God told Abraham to put Issac up on the Altar, he was asking a simple question.  I'm going to give you everything, but what are you going to give me?"

Through his actions, Abraham  showed his willingness to give up everything in service to the lord.    Issac wasn't sacrificed on the altar that day, but Abraham most certainly was.  As a result, he became the father of the Israelites.

Siddhartha Gautama also sacrificed a great deal in his religious quest.  When he left the palace to begin his journey he left behind a wife and new born son.  At the end of that journey he sat down beneath the Bodhi tree proclaiming:

Even if my flesh and blood were to dry up, leaving only skin and bones, I will not leave this place until I find a way to end all sorrow.

He sat beneath the tree without moving for 49 days.  During this time he was visited by Mara, the lord of desire, many times.  Each time, the demon gave Siddhartha visions of what he would be giving up if he continued on his quest.

Mara showed him the riches and glories that he could have if Siddartha returned to palace life.  But Siddartha refused.  Next, Mara sent his daughters to tempt him with sensual pleasures.  But Siddartha refused.

Finally, Mara appeared with a great army and demanded to know by what right Siddartha could claim holiness, who would bear witness for him?  In response, Siddartha touched the ground saying, "The earth is my witness".  Upon hearing this, Mara was defeated.

In that moment, Siddartha Gautama died beneath the Bodhi tree.  And Buddha, the awakened one, was born.  

The Buddha would later go on to found a religious order, Buddhism, that is now the 4th largest faith tradition in the world.  I've been thinking about these stories a lot lately because it's becoming clear to me that great faith requires great sacrifice.  

When Abraham placed Issac on the altar he turned his back on all of the hopes and aspirations he had for the future.  His willingness to sacrifice for his beliefs allowed him to move into a deeper relationship with God.

When Buddha chose the Dharma, as symbolized by the earth, over wealth and sensual pleasures, it allowed him to realize enlightenment.  His willingness to let go of worldly things helped him attain Nirvana.

This is important because as we move deeper into the practice, Buddhism stops giving us things.  And it starts taking them away.  It does this not because these things are bad, but because they keep us from seeing the bigger picture.

This has been on my mind lately because I'm realizing that there are certain things I can't do anymore if I want to progress in my training.  Different types of movies and discussion topics that I used to enjoy seem crass and humorless now.  When I'm invited places with friends, I find myself wondering, "How will this effect my meditation."

I'm reminded of a quote by Thomas Merton, a Trappist monk, who said:

Every moment and every event in a man's life plants something in his soul.

Increasingly, I find myself asking, "What seeds are being planted within me?"  What impact is this TV show or website having on my practice, and is it moving me closer to Nirvana, or farther away?

Also, I'm starting to realize that Buddhism has already planted something inside of me.  I can tell when that something is growing, and I can tell when it dies a little.  More than that, I know that I'm responsible for ensuring that it grows; that it's nurtured and cared for in the same way that I care for my physical body.

But I have to clear out space within me for this something to grow.  I have to sacrifice the things that jeopardize it's growth.  And just like Abraham and Buddha I must make a choice between worldly desires and spiritual practice over and over again.

I posted a new video to my YouTube Channel!

Sacrifice Under the Bodhi Tree