There's a joke that you hear a lot in business about a conversation between two bulls. They're standing on top of a mountain, and stretched out below them is a pasture, filled with lovely young cows.
The younger bull looks at his friend and says, "Hey, lets run down there, and make love to one of those cows." The older, wiser bull responds, "No, let's walk down there, and make love to them all."
The lesson is pretty straight-forward. If you rush head-long into a project, you'll get limited results. But if you take your time, and plan ahead, you'll get everything you want. It makes sense on the surface, but now that I'm the ripe, old age of 30-something I'm realizing that it's completely wrong.
Planning is good. Taking your time is good. But it doesn't matter how carefully we plan or how slowly we move in the end.
That's why the second noble truth states that suffering is caused by desire. Because there will always be something... more laying just out of reach. Maybe we're happily married, but we still think about the "one that got away". Perhaps we have a steady job, but we long to write the great american novel. Or our wish to travel the world is hampered by responsibilities that force us to stay home.
The human brain is very good at coming up with "one more thing" that we need in order to be happy. But this incessant desire for new things and experiences results in us feeling empty, lost, and disappointed in spite of the many blessings that we possess.
The road to happiness is paved with moments of acceptance. And part of that is learning to accept that there are things in life that we'll never have. But this doesn't have to be a reason for sadness. On the contrary, not having it all can be a source of great peace.
When we stop thinking about "the one that got away", we're able to focus on the one that's here right now. And giving up our dream to travel the world allows us to make the most of life at home.
That's why Buddhism teaches us to regulate our desires. Not because they're bad, but because turning away from desire allows to live life more fully, without regrets. In the end, we realize that we're not slaves to our inclinations, and we can choose how we live in the world.
In that moment, we don't need to run down the mountain. And we don't need to walk down either. Instead, we can remain at the summit, and appreciate the view.
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No one gets to have it all. This is the truth of life.
That's why the second noble truth states that suffering is caused by desire. Because there will always be something... more laying just out of reach. Maybe we're happily married, but we still think about the "one that got away". Perhaps we have a steady job, but we long to write the great american novel. Or our wish to travel the world is hampered by responsibilities that force us to stay home.
The human brain is very good at coming up with "one more thing" that we need in order to be happy. But this incessant desire for new things and experiences results in us feeling empty, lost, and disappointed in spite of the many blessings that we possess.
The road to happiness is paved with moments of acceptance. And part of that is learning to accept that there are things in life that we'll never have. But this doesn't have to be a reason for sadness. On the contrary, not having it all can be a source of great peace.
When we stop thinking about "the one that got away", we're able to focus on the one that's here right now. And giving up our dream to travel the world allows us to make the most of life at home.
The beauty of life is found in the gaps, in the things we'll never have.
That's why Buddhism teaches us to regulate our desires. Not because they're bad, but because turning away from desire allows to live life more fully, without regrets. In the end, we realize that we're not slaves to our inclinations, and we can choose how we live in the world.
In that moment, we don't need to run down the mountain. And we don't need to walk down either. Instead, we can remain at the summit, and appreciate the view.
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I'm 44 years old and still have to learn this one again and again. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteSadhu,sadhu,sadhu
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